Little Daily Miracles
by jaxicen
Summary: "What is the meaning of life? That was all- a simple question; one that tended to close in on one with years, the great revelation had never come. The great revelation perhaps never did come. Instead, there were little daily miracles, illuminations, matches struck unexpectedly in the dark; here was one."
1. A Staring Elf

These are short stories where two people find, rediscover or be with each other. It could happen anytime, anywhere, in any situation. Perhaps, it could even happen to you and me.

**Disclaimer: **This is completely unrelated to the actual Skins. Places stated are written as closely accurate as possible but possibly with a huge margin of error. The blanket of fiction covers all inaccuracies of any kind or form. Any semblances to people and real life events are purely coincidental or exaggerated. The use of imagination is much appreciated.

* * *

**A Staring Elf**

"Hurry up you twat," Naomi called over her shoulder.

She climbed the remaining steps of that flight and stood on the top step. Her lips were slightly parted and her chest heaved a slow rhythm as she panted out the exertion. Her brow was dotted with beads of perspiration; the back of her grey t-shirt was soaked through and clung tightly onto her skin, making her feel very uncomfortable. The worse thing was that she was wearing a tight pair of jeans. She shook her head a little and twisted the corner of her mouth in annoyance at the slow lumbering figure still clamouring up the steps.

She really disliked the climate; it was hot, humid and stuffy. Plus it had just rained two hours ago so the humidity level was high. Every time when she was out of the air-conditioned places, she perspired ridiculous amounts. She figured out that her body probably just wasn't made for tropical climate countries. That was unfortunate because she absolutely loved the culture and the food the South East Asian countries had. And that was why she agreed to go on two month long trip covering Cambodia, Laos, Myanmar, Thailand, Vietnam and Malaysia. She was now in Singapore, the last stop of her travels.

She thought her body would have gotten used to the climate by now but apparently she had never imagined that this was the ultimate endurance test. At least in Chiang Mai, the nights were cool; or when she was in Cameron Highlands, she had to put on a thin sweater at night to keep her warm. As for Singapore, right now, at six o'clock in the evening, she just wanted to return back to their hostel, remove all her clothes and hop straight into a long cold shower.

Naomi sighed as she kind of regretted agreeing to attend this concert with Freddie on the spur of the moment. Somehow he found out that one of his favourite bands was holding a concert at Fort Canning Park in Singapore for the first time so he suggested they get tickets. It was also his idea that it would be fun experiencing a concert with the local people. Usually she was fond of spontaneity but this was one of the times she regretted letting him decide. It has to be the climate's fault. It would be so much better if the temperature could just turn down ten degrees. That would make her feel loads better and less grouchy.

Freddie finally reached the top stair. He was panting harder than Naomi. His hair was matted with perspiration; his fringe that usually fell effortlessly and fashionably over his forehead was plastered appallingly instead, in an unsightly way with drops of perspiration oozing out from its tips. His t-shirt was also drenched with sweat; he looked a mess and Naomi thought she must have looked just as bad too but she really couldn't care, not in this heat.

"Can you walk faster? The good spots are going to be all taken up," Naomi grumbled. It was as though she was the one excited about the concert. Although she had no idea how good or fantastic the band was, she still wanted a decent spot to view them from. She would hate getting a spot way behind or get her view blocked by someone tall.

"Aww babe, I'm carrying a bag." Freddie flashed his puppy dog eyes and attempted to swipe his fringe out of his eyes, making himself look even worse.

"There's almost nothing in the bag," Naomi snapped back. "You smoke far too fucking much."

Freddie chuckled, "Alright, alright." He laced his hand through hers and gave a little squeeze. Naomi almost wanted to pull away because his hand was slimy and clammy with his perspiration, and so was hers too. It was disgusting, mixing perspiration together. But his squeeze was affectionate and he bent down and kissed her cheek, so Naomi didn't have the heart to pull away.

She huffed a little and tugged at his hand, "Come on slow poke, I want to get a good spot."

They made their way, hand in hand, up another flight of brick stairs and followed a small crowd of locals along a winding road pavement finally reaching a queue. After waiting in line for fifteen minutes, they flashed their tickets, got their hands stamped and followed the people in front of them through another path. They hadn't reached the main concert area yet it seemed like they've walked for ages. It was already almost dark and a few lamps lighted the path.

Finally, they entered a fenced compound through the side entrance. A tall stage was right in front of a large span of grass that was gently sloping upwards. There were no proper seats; everyone was sitting on mats on the grass or standing and chatting with their friends.

It was 6:40pm and they were still considered early. Although the area in front of the stage was already filled with people, there was still space of about seven metres away from the stage. It was a decent viewing spot and this would do.

"What time does it start again?" Naomi asked.

"About 8?" Freddie shrugged.

"Well thank fuck we brought a mat."

The grass was wet and slightly muddy with the earlier rain.

"What mat?" Freddie looked slightly confused, startled.

"The plastic mat I told you to bring along before we left the hostel?" Naomi frowned.

"No babe, I thought you were going to bring the mat." Freddie looked positively startled now.

"Do you see me carrying any bag now?" Naomi fumed, thinking for the second time that day what a twat Freddie was. She could not believe how stupid he was to miss that out.

"Uh."

"We can't stand for more than a hour! I'm not sitting on the grass! It's all muddy and gross." Naomi rambled agitatedly.

"Relax, we can walk around outside." Freddie tried to sooth his girlfriend's nerves, successfully missing her hand that he wanted to hold to calm her down.

"Don't be stupid, we'll give up such a good spot. I can't believe you forgot it, after I reminded you this morning." Naomi grumbled again.

"_Excuse me, miss. Excuse me."_

"What?" Naomi said with more irritation in her voice than required as she turned her head to the direction of the voice.

A startled looking boy with slightly curly messy brown hair was seated on a plastic sheet two metres away from where Naomi and Freddie were standing. To his left was a girl with long hair of the brightest, most vibrantly deep shade of red Naomi had ever seen. The girl was looking, no, staring right at her with a curious look on her face. Naomi's mouth suddenly ran dry as she held that stare for a few seconds, feeling her heart beat suddenly pick up it's thumping pace.

"Yes, can I help you with something?" She recovered from the little staring competition and looked back at the boy, managing to find her tongue.

This was the first time Naomi noticed that they were not the only two Caucasians here. There were a few scattered about the place, sitting in the midst of the locals. She hadn't realised another two of them were just metres from them, listening to Freddie and herself argue.

"Well, technically not." The brown haired boy started to speak again. He sounded a little chirpy; his words having a little staccato in them; he sounded like he was English too. "I'm not helping you with anything, it's more of us helping you actually – but I was wondering, well, no, Emily and I were wondering whether you would like to share the mat, the one we are sitting on right now. It is just a suggestion of course, because we overhead, not that we were eavesdropping but you were speaking too loudly, that you've forgotten to bring a mat so we thought you probably could share it with us."

Naomi stared at the boy, bewildered by the amount of words that just rushed out of his mouth in seconds. The girl beside him was rubbing her hand slowly on his back as though she was comforting him.

"Cheers mate, that will be great!" Freddie broke the small pause with a chuckle. "Babe you alright with this?"

Naomi's attention had drifted again to the redhead, Emily – if she didn't get that wrong, who was staring at her again with an expression a little daring, a little challenging, a little questioning, like she was waiting for Naomi's answer. It was something about her big eyes or that cute button nose or that long red hair that even shone in the dark under the dim lights that drew her. Truthfully, Naomi thought that girl looked rather beautiful.

"Awesome," Naomi replied after a heartbeat, a small shy grin emerging from her lips. "You sure there's enough space?" She directed her question to the boy again as the redhead hadn't said a word.

"Not a problem," the redhead finally spoke, her lips breaking into a dazzling smile.

Naomi's eyes widened in a faint surprise; she totally did not expect such a low husky voice to come from her. It was the sexiest female voice she ever heard, ever. Naomi wanted to hear her speak again. She didn't know whether it was the redhead's voice, her smile or her hair, or a combination of all that made Naomi's stomach do a weird flutter and her heart an offbeat skip.

The redhead shifted herself closer to the boy, trying to make space on her left, which Naomi felt was for her. Truth be told, the plastic piece they were sitting on wasn't much of a mat. It looked suspiciously like a plastic poncho that was converted into a 'mat'. There definitely wasn't much space. They would have to sit really closely to each other. Even so, Naomi would have this anytime then sit on the muddy grass. Plus, sitting beside the redhead seemed like a fantastic idea.

Naomi plonked herself down clumsily; her arse hitting the hard ground an inch away from the redhead's arse and her right arm accidentally knocking the redhead's left arm.

"Opps, sorry." Naomi muttered, cringing at how she inappropriately bumped her sticky skin on the girl.

"It's okay." The girl replied good-naturedly with another smile on her face. She was wearing a baggy grey singlet with a picture of a brand of beer, which Naomi thought she saw it in Thailand, and a pair of jeans. It showed of the redhead's perfectly toned arms and delicate collarbone. Naomi thought she looked rather fit and pretty.

Freddie sat himself closely beside Naomi's left. She grimaced as his sweaty arm was flushed against hers.

"I'm Emily." The redhead turned her face to Naomi again and held out her hand, staring at her straight in the eye. Something about the eye contact was doing something to Naomi's stomach too.

"I know," Naomi automatically said noticing that the redhead's face lit up a little more delightedly. "I mean I heard him mention just now." She tried to recover from that, feeling that she remembered this information about her name too easily. "Naomi," she reached out and formally shook Emily's hand. Emily's hand was small and her skin was soft and smooth unlike her slightly clammy one. Naomi felt like she was disgusting with her sweaty dirty skin.

"Naomi," Emily repeated her name. The way Emily said her name, or rolled her name on her tongue with that husky tone was making Naomi's heart beat even faster. She couldn't comprehend why it was so. "Nice name," Emily added with a smile, her dark eyes were shining. It was something about Emily's eyes as she said Naomi's name that was making her hard to look away. She felt slightly conscious of her appearance and wished hard she didn't look as unsightly as she imagined. "This is JJ," she pointed at the boy next to her and he gave a little wave.

"Freddie," Freddie introduced himself.

"Are you guys from London?" Emily asked.

"Yup, you too?" Naomi said.

"We're from Bristol."

"So what brings you to Singapore?"

"We took a gap year after university," JJ explained, "to you know, see the world, travel to all the countries we've never imagined living in, stay with the local people, do volunteer work. It's an eye opener really, something we don't get if we just stayed in England and went on with our daily lives, never really seeing the world and what is out there."

"Sounds like you had a great experience," Naomi said.

"We did," Emily nodded, "we met so many nice people along the way when we got lost or couldn't read signs. We even met a very nice guy in Thailand that we had breakfast with and he drove us to our train station to save us lots of time." Emily's eyes had the faraway look as she recalled the memories they experienced. Naomi was fascinated with Emily's eyes; it had a certain spark in it.

"What about you?" JJ asked both of them.

"We've only got two months to travel," Freddie replied. "Managed to get Naoms to take two months of leave from her job."

"Oh, what do you work as?" Emily turned her attention back on Naomi, interested.

"I'm just a journalist," Naomi answered.

"Not just a journalist babe," Freddie chuckled and put his arm around her, "She's pretty fucking good at what she does." He smiled at her with pride. Naomi was flattered, really. Freddie was proud of her accomplishment in the few months she had on the job as she was promoted within just two months in. But she didn't really want his arm around her or the fact that he kept calling her 'babe' in front of Emily. It was a strange thought; Naomi tried to brush that thought away. She noticed that Emily's eyes seemed to have strayed to Freddie's arm that was around her.

"What would you wanna do when you get back?" Naomi asked Emily, drawing the topic away from her to Emily whom she was more interested in.

"Oh, um," Emily's eyes snapped up to hers a little sheepishly, "I've a degree in Psychology. I kind of want to do counselling, work with people you know. I love meeting people, I find people fascinating, the lives they went through that brought them to where they are." There it was again, that recurring shine in Emily's eyes that Naomi had come to notice. She wondered if her eyes shone like Emily's too.

A couple of people were smoking a few metres in front of where they sat and Emily wrinkled up her nose and waved the smoke away. Naomi thought that was the cutest thing she'd ever seen. Shit, did she just call Emily's nose cute?

"Fuck, I need a fag," Freddie declared and reached for his pack.

Naomi noticed a look of faint annoyance on Emily's face and she reckoned Emily probably didn't like the smoke near her too much. Emily smelled faintly of something flowery that Naomi thought was nice. She hoped she didn't stink of perspiration.

"Could you smoke outside Freds?" Naomi asked.

"Okay, you coming babe?"

"Nah I'm good." She watched him as he stood up and sauntered out.

"You smoke too?" Emily's voice brought her back.

"Just an occasional one or two," Naomi lied a little. It was true, she was trying to cut down and eventually quit but it was hard since her boyfriend smoked quite a bit.

Emily nodded. She looked as though she wanted to say something but she didn't.

"Oh my look at the time, it's only 7pm." JJ glanced at his watch. "One more hour to go."

Emily unzipped her bag and took out two brown packets, each were tied shut with a rubber band. She handed one to JJ and removed the rubber band from her packet. Naomi was extremely curious as to what was inside it.

"Don't mind us, we just arrived and hadn't had our dinner." Emily opened her packet and the most amazing smell wafted out from the packet.

"Chicken rice." Naomi's mouth watered as she remembered the familiar scent. She had that yesterday and she could clearly remember how her first taste of it was like. The chicken she ate was juicy and tender, and the rice was hot and delicious.

"Yummy!" Emily had her mouth full of rice and chicken. A grain of rice clung unaware at the side of her mouth and Naomi instantly reached out her hand and brushed it away. The barest of touches startled her as her fingers made contact with Emily's soft skin and sent her heart racing again. She thought she saw a startled look on Emily's eyes but it was gone in a flash as soon as it appeared. "You want some?" Emily asked, after hurriedly swallowing her mouthful.

"No it's okay, it's your dinner." Naomi said. And right at that moment, her stomach did the loudest unprecedented rumble it ever made in her life.

Emily threw back her head and laughed, hearing Naomi's stomach growl. Naomi thought that was the nicest, most delicious laugh she had ever heard. And what a long and slender neck Emily had. She caught herself again; she couldn't understand why she was observing all of Emily's attributes.

"No way, you should have some. There's enough for two." Emily giggled and scooped up a spoonful of rice and a piece of chicken. "Here, open up."

Before Naomi had any time to refuse, Emily's spoon had materialised in front of her mouth and all she could do was obediently open her mouth and receive the food. She looked into Emily's eyes as she did that, noting that Emily's gaze never wavered from hers. She realised then that Emily's eyes were a deep chocolate brown in colour. She was captivated.

She chewed the food slowly. It wasn't hot anymore, rather tepid and almost cold in fact but the taste was still there. Another kind of heat, instead, formed on her cheeks. A total stranger just fed her, sharing saliva and all that; and the thing was, she liked it.

"Have some more!" Emily cheerfully said and put the packet into Naomi's hands as she dug out a bottle from her bag and unscrewed it. She took a few gulps and handed the bottle over to JJ. He drank from it and somehow ended up coughing. Emily patted and rubbed his back to sooth him. A tiny twinge of jealousy stirred up in Naomi and she pushed that ridiculous feeling away; it hadn't occurred to her that Emily and JJ were a couple too. Emily was certainly very sweet and caring to him.

Emily handed the bottle to Naomi. "I'm good, brought my own," Naomi said.

At that moment, Freddie appeared and sat down beside her, reeking of cigarette smoke. She'd never found the smell less appealing than right now. The smell completely covered Emily's sweet smelling scent that she had been delightedly and surreptitiously sniffing for the past few minutes. He pulled out a bottle from the bag and drank from it, offering to Naomi after. Naomi shook her head feeling that she didn't want to taste cigarettes right now. They passed the packet back and forth, sharing the food, in silence.

"So how long have you two been together?" She asked Emily after they finished the food; she was curious to know.

"We're not together," Emily gave a laugh, turning to JJ with a smile. "He's my best friend."

"We've known each other since high school. So after we graduated from university, we decided to travel together," JJ piped in. "It's a common misconception that when people of the opposite sex travel together, they are naturally a couple but Lara doesn't mind. Oh, Lara's my girlfriend that I met in my class in university. We've been happily together for more than a year and Emily and her get along very well together." Emily laughed at JJ's rambling again and Naomi couldn't help but feel a tiny bit of relief at what JJ just said.

"Besides," JJ added, "I am barely Emily's type." He chuckled and Emily nudged him with her elbow and threw him a look that Naomi felt like she was left out of some inside joke between them. A little part of her felt jealous again but then she reckoned it was irrational to feel this way. It wasn't her prerogative to know everything between Emily and JJ; she barely knew them.

"What about you two," Emily turned her shining eyes to Naomi with a curious look. "How long have you been together?"

There was a slight pause and a silence. Naomi's mind whirred at top speed trying to count the number of months and days. She realised she couldn't remember; it was either too long or too complicated.

"Four years in one month's time," Freddie replied cheerfully as though the silence never happened and placed a kiss on Naomi's lips. Naomi tried not to flinch away from the cigarette taste of his lips as she was feeling a truckload of guilt for not remembering how long they were together.

JJ let out a low whistle, "That's pretty long."

"Yeah," Freddie smiled, "Met this gorgeous girl with the most beautiful blue eyes I've ever seen on the first day in my journalism class and I told myself, 'that girl will be my girlfriend'. Plucked up courage to get her number after school, which she refused, but I didn't give up. To cut a long story short, she was my girlfriend five months later." He finished, looking a little smug but with a blissful look on his face.

Naomi smiled, she couldn't exactly remember why she gave her number to Freddie four years ago or remember why the hell she agreed to be his girlfriend. However the four years she spent with him had its fair share of trouble and happy times. She had grown accustomed to him, a connubial normalcy with him, she was used to him. They had their exciting and passionate days but as the years went on, they fell into comfortableness, like a married couple. There wasn't much of the exciting spark now but she thinks she is still happy in his company, something she had grown used to.

She felt Emily's eyes on her. True enough, they were looking at her, searchingly, curiously, but the bright spark in it had diminished. Emily looked away. That was the first time she looked away first. Naomi couldn't help but feel a little… unsettled, discombobulated, at Emily unapparent reaction.

"What about you Emily?" Freddie asked. "Any boyfriend?"

"Nope," Emily answered in a second. "Single and available," she added, grinning a little at Freddie and faced straight ahead again, not looking at Naomi.

"Gee, what a shame. I'd be glad to hook you up with some of my mates when we're back."

Emily laughed and shook her head, "Thanks but that won't be necessary."

A strange tingling gladness seeped into Naomi, it bubbled within her. An unexpected smile suddenly materialised; it was just a tiny upward twitch on one side of her mouth. Naomi stared stupidly at the profile of Emily's face, which was partially obscured by her flaming red hair. Emily inhaled and blew out all the air through her mouth, causing her fringe to fly upwards. That, Naomi thought, was the second cutest thing she saw today. As though sensing her stare, Emily turned her head towards Naomi, her brown eyes meeting her blue ones, and gave a tiny smile at her. The look on her brown eyes seemed to be conveying something Naomi couldn't quite put her finger on. Instant butterflies erupted in her stomach in a way she'd never felt before. She didn't know whether it was the way Emily looked at her, or how her tongue darted out to wet her pink lips, or whether her mind was telling her how beautiful Emily looked as the light shone on her face making it look flawless and ethereal.

Just then JJ spoke to Emily and she looked at him. The tangible connection was broken. Naomi looked down, and then at everything and anywhere except the redhead beside her. A strange thought had crept into her mind, something insane, something shocking; she immediately blocked it out, arrested it, stopped it from furthering. The single connection that remained between them was a small touch of Emily's smooth cool skin of her arm slightly resting on hers, which none of them attempted to shift away.

Naomi couldn't imagine how easy and effortless it was to talk to Emily. Naomi's usually the kind of person that rarely initiates conversation or opens up to strangers immediately but throughout the whole time, she asked many questions and said things that made Emily laugh. It was either Emily laughed easily or what she said was funny to her. She loved to hear Emily's laugh; she continued trying to make her laugh.

She was also interested in the travel stories both Emily and JJ told and their lives back in England. The more she spoke to Emily, the more she wanted to know about this girl who seemed to emit some kind of addictive happiness Naomi just couldn't get enough. There was something captivating about her personality, her air of humble confidence and dorky quirks Naomi found cute and hilarious, that she had discovered within an hour.

The lights dimmed and excited screams and shouts rang all over.

"It's starting!" Emily exclaimed excitedly.

The four of them hurriedly stood up. JJ snatched up the plastic sheet off the grass and kept it as they shuffled their way down nearer to the stage. People all around them were squeezing with each other, almost elbow to elbow. Naomi glanced behind her. The huge space that was empty earlier on was now filled with multitudes of people. She was glad of this spot they had.

They stood in a line. It was then that Naomi realised Emily's head only reached up to her eyes and that she had a slim, petit figure. Her eyes travelled lower and she noticed that Emily also had a small perky bum encased in a pair of tight jeans.

Her potential further observations were disrupted timely as the band members emerged and positioned themselves at their instruments. They had the weirdest stuff on stage; standing light bulbs, a backdrop with the projection of strange undecipherable images and a couple of instruments Naomi hadn't seen before. The coolest thing was that the front man of the band was carrying the bow of a cello on one hand and his electric guitar slung over him. Naomi's mouth fell open; that was fascinating. Her eyes automatically snapped to Emily and she saw a huge smile on the girl's face and shining eyes completely transfixed and mesmerised to what was on the stage. The best part of it was that the band hadn't even started. But Naomi already knew it was going to be one helluva gig.

Notes to the first song started, it sounded like some mysterious musical box tune that went on for a little while. Suddenly the drums thumped and the music from all instruments came together in unison, blaring out of the speakers at great force. The sound was massive, overwhelming and sonorous; despite not knowing the song, Naomi experienced a surreal euphoric rush. The front man dragged the bow on his electric guitar with force and passion; it was mind blowing. Goosebumps appeared and the tiny hairs on her arms stood in attention as she closed her eyes and tilted her head skywards, soaking herself in the music, a smile on her face. The music soared and swooped and she felt as though she was flying in the galaxies. _This is amazing._ She silently thanked Freddie in her mind for bringing her to this gig.

Naomi opened her eyes. There it was, Emily was looking at her again with a big grin stretched on her lips as though she knew what Naomi was personally experiencing. No words could describe but Naomi knew joy and euphoria was written clearly on her face. She glanced over at Freddie who had the same awestruck look on his face.

She was enjoying every moment of it. About six songs had passed and even losing herself in the out-of-the-world music, she found herself staring at Emily more often then she should. And the thing is, Emily was looking back at her too. They weren't full on staring but more of little frequent glances out of the corner of their eyes. They seem to catch each other's eye all the time. It made her mouth dry and her heart beat exceptionally fast but Naomi liked it; she really liked it.

There was a slight pause as the front man took off his current guitar and slung another one. This time it was a bass guitar. There were cheers again but this time, it felt like the crowd was buzzing on a different level and frequency. Even Emily seemed to be bouncing excitedly on her toes.

When the first four notes of the song were played, everyone screamed and cheered even louder than usual. This must be one of the popular songs. Emily whipped her head towards Naomi; her face was lit up and delight, joy and elation were evidently pouring out from her eyes. She looked exceptionally beautiful, carefree, glowing; her eyes were scintillant. It was overwhelming her, the music, and the look Emily was giving her. She felt more alive and filled then she had ever felt. The music was uplifting, rising up every problem if anyone had and discarding it, filling her up with a special happiness.

Naomi looked to her left and saw Freddie had his eyes shut and hands raised in the air, soaking it in. She felt a hand slip into her right, lacing though her fingers. At once she locked eyes with the culprit. Her slightly stunned ones fixated on the shining smiling eyes of the other. She couldn't look away and she couldn't pull away. A thrill like no other shot through her body like white-hot electricity when Emily squeezed her hand. Emily's hand was slightly smaller than hers, smooth and warm. It was different holding her hand as compared to Freddie's hand earlier on. She didn't want to let go of Emily's hand.

Emily opened her mouth and sang the starting words to the song, and so did the hundreds there; everyone seemed to know the words by heart even though they were of a different and rare language. Naomi couldn't hear it but she knew Emily was half shouting half singing the lyrics. Her face was beaming, bursting, blissful. Emily turned to her and sang, her unwavering eyes locked onto Naomi's.

Naomi smiled without inhibition. Her head was spinning in circles. She held on tighter to Emily's hand and the whole world felt a blur except where Emily was standing.

The music was like an orchestra, enhancing what she was experiencing. Her sensors were tingling; she could smell the scent of Emily's hair, yet she was still paying attention to the glorious music sweeping over them.

When the song ended, she loosened her hold on Emily's hand but not quite letting it go. She daren't look at Emily; she looked straight ahead at the stage, fully aware of how hard and how loud her heart was thumping in her ears and how hot her cheeks felt. Freddie wrapped a hand around her waist and pulled her towards him. Naomi dropped Emily's hand instantly with a jump. Freddie kissed her and she let him. A feeling of guilt crept into her heart. He felt so right and yet so wrong; Emily felt so wrong yet so right.

She stole a look at Emily who kept her face turned away from her, talking instead into JJ's ear. She had the sudden insane urge to kiss Emily; an urge she didn't know where it came from and why it surfaced again. All she knew was that she had never experienced that sort of connection just holding hands with someone before.

Naomi kept her distance from Emily after that. Their shoulders still brushed, furtive fleeting looks were thrown about wildly, but none of them made a move. Naomi's mind was whirring at top speed; the questions she had and the possibilities her mind was churning up were unsettling her. She wondered if Emily felt anything like what she's feeling right now, or Naomi was the only one over thinking things.

The band finished the last song and disappeared offstage though everyone knew there would be an encore. The crowd was clapping and chanting for the band to reappear and play more songs. Even Emily and JJ were joining in the chanting.

Just then, a couple drops of water landed on Naomi's nose and cheek. She looked upwards and opened her palms noting that a few other people around were doing the same thing and muttering to each other. A few more drops landed on her t-shirt. Then a few more.

"Shit it's going to rain," Naomi said to no one in particular.

In a few seconds, light rain started to descend. There was a flurry of movement where everyone was either putting on their ponchos or opening umbrellas. JJ pulled out the very same plastic sheet they sat on earlier and put it on. There were muddy stains on it but the rain would wash them all away. Emily rummaged through her bag, bringing out a small foldable umbrella and opened it.

"Want to share?" Emily asked Naomi, a little awkwardly, shyly.

Naomi nodded a little uncertainly. The umbrella could barely shelter two people; they still had to take into consideration sheltering Freddie.

"_Excuse me, do you want to share with us?"_ A voice out of nowhere asked. Two girls with a large umbrella directed the question to Freddie.

"Well…" Freddie looked at Naomi. "Sure, if it's okay?"

Naomi nodded her head. It seemed like a good idea as Emily's umbrella was far to small to cover three of them.

"I'll hold it," Naomi offered, as she was the taller one.

She took the handle of the umbrella with her right hand. Emily shifted closer to her left, closer to Naomi, and hesitantly snaked her left hand around Naomi's waist. Naomi stiffened at the touch, her eyes widened in surprise.

"Um, we should move closer so we wouldn't get too wet," Emily said unsurely.

Her voice was just inches away from Naomi's ear and it sent unexpected shivers down her spine. Naomi was sure that that had nothing to do with the cold wind that started to blow. Her heart started pounding in her chest again and she really hoped Emily couldn't hear it.

The band finally emerged to cheers despite the pouring rain. They started to play but Naomi couldn't see the stage anymore, everyone's umbrellas blocked her view. Yet she couldn't care, not with a gorgeous redhead snuggled into her.

"Is this okay?" Emily muttered quietly over the splattering of rain on the nylon umbrella.

"Yeah," Naomi breathed out, still a little stiff from Emily's touch. It wasn't that she didn't like it; she liked it, if she dared to admit it.

Emily must have taken her response as an uncomfortable one as she slowly withdrew her hand, mumbling something less audible to Naomi.

Immediately, Naomi switched the umbrella to her left hand, her right arm going over Emily's shoulders, keeping her in place.

"No, don't move," Naomi almost commanded. Emily's face had a slightly stunned look. "We should, stay like this, for a bit, till the rain stops."

She was awarded with the brightest smile as Emily regained her hold on Naomi's waist. A secret happy smile threatened to break from Naomi's lips. Naomi could believe how well they fit together. It was strange, familiar, easy, terrifying, confusing, exciting. The scent of Emily's hair was closer now and it was making her giddy with delight.

They stayed like this for an entire song like a seasoned couple huddled together to keep away from the rain. Naomi wasn't really paying attention to the music anymore. Her body was buzzing and her eyes were secretly glancing sideways at Emily who was still closing her eyes, pretty much absorbed in the music. From where Naomi was, she could clearly see Emily's thick long lashes, delicately shaped eyebrows, pouty pink lips and flawless skin. She couldn't keep her eyes off her.

The rain didn't stop; instead it came down heavier as the band went into their second encore song. Naomi looked up to see how JJ was coping in his poncho. The white plastic was sticking to his skin and his face was wet but underneath it all, he should be dry. Naomi chuckled as she thought of something funny.

"JJ looks like a wrinkled condom," Naomi mouthed the words into Emily's ear, her lips brushing lightly on Emily's strands of hair.

Emily whipped her head around to take a look at him and gave a throaty laugh. "I think you could be right!" She continued to giggle at JJ who looked at her with a questioning look. Naomi secretly lauded herself for making Emily laugh again.

She was contented to stand there forever half embracing Emily under the umbrella in the rain. But the band finished the last song with much applause and cheers from everyone. Surprisingly the rain also stopped at the same time. It was as though the brilliance of the music caused the sky to weep and stop when it ended.

They released their hold on each other at the same time; Emily shuffled away from her. Naomi missed the feeling of the redhead's warm body heat.

"Thanks for holding the umbrella," Emily said with a small smile.

"No, thank you. If it weren't for you, I would be completely drenched," Naomi said. They locked eyes and shared a moment's smile.

There was a loud rustling sound as JJ struggled to remove his poncho and Emily immediately went over to help him.

Freddie came over, beaming happily. "That was fucking ace innit!"

Naomi could only nod in agreement for other unexplainable reasons.

Slowly, they followed the crowd and filed out of the exit. Freddie was beside Naomi the whole time excitedly talking about the gig. Naomi was listening with as much attention as she could give, her eyes subconsciously drifting to Emily and JJ walking slightly behind them. They climbed down the same steep brick steps and crossed the road, leaving Fort Canning Park and making their way to the train station.

"Where do you guys stay?" Freddie asked.

JJ replied with a place that was towards a different direction to where Freddie and her were staying.

"Okay."

"So."

"Well."

"It was nice meeting you." Emily directed it to Naomi with a beautiful and sincere smile.

"Same." Naomi tried to return the smile but her heart dropped as she realised that she probably wouldn't see this girl anymore.

All of them exchanged their goodbyes. Naomi was trying hard not to show her disappointment. Her heart constricted with a certain kind of unexplainable pain.

"Naomi." Emily called her back at the last second as she was about to walk away with Freddie.

Emily walked right up to her and pressed a small piece of paper into her hand. Naomi looked at it. It was a crumpled receipt. On the back of it was a line of numbers scrawled in a neat handwriting. Naomi smiled as she saw Emily had wrote her name too and had dotted her "i" with a heart.

"We're going to Indonesia and the Philippines after this for two weeks before heading back to Bristol. So…" Emily paused biting her lips, her cheeks slightly red, "If you're up for it, if you want to, maybe we could meet up one day when we're all back, in London or Bristol or wherever." She rushed her words out in a hurry, clearly nervous. Naomi thought that could be the third cutest thing she had seen today. "Then again maybe not, I mean it's up to you –" Emily rambled on.

"I will." Naomi said, secretly delighted. She could seriously have this girl as a friend. Meeting Emily felt like a dim part of her life she never knew had been illuminated, like a match stuck unexpectedly in the dark, a little miracle that doesn't always happen daily. She knew they had this indubitable connection that made her want to cling tightly and shamelessly onto. When she saw the light in the smile Emily gave her, Naomi knew that she made the right choice.

"So, goodbye, for now."

"Bye." Returned Naomi, not quite wanting to go.

To her surprise, Emily lurched forward and embraced her in a tight hug. Naomi instinctively wrapped her arms around Emily's petite frame and gave a squeeze, relishing how nice Emily felt in her arms, smelling her shampoo for the last time. It all lasted for three seconds and Emily pulled away and planted a quick kiss on Naomi's cheek. It was a small peck, cursory, nothing unusual or worth reading into it, but warmth spread from where Emily's lips landed to her cheeks and down every pore and fibre of her body. When Emily fully released her, her cheeks were flushed and her brown eyes didn't quite meet Naomi's ones. Emily threw a tiny wave and hurried after JJ into the station, disappearing out of her life.

"Shall we grab some food?" Freddie asked her.

"Yeah, sure."

Freddie held her hand as they walked; chatting away happily and not noticing how quiet Naomi had gone. Naomi absent-mindedly touched the spot on her cheek that Emily kissed. And she felt something she had never felt before in her life.

* * *

Naomi woke with a jolt. She tossed about her large bed for a few seconds before opening her eyes, squinting. Her room was bathed in brilliant white light streaming through the windows. The bright light was causing her head to hurt. She looked at the clock on her bedside table; it was just after 3pm; that explained why she was famished. She hadn't had dinner last night, choosing instead to go to bed and bury herself under the covers, eventually falling asleep.

She eyed the tiny square box beside her clock, thoughts flashing back to what happened a week ago. She remembered being invited over after work, having a good home cooked dinner and giving a simple gift to mark their four years. Then she remembered freezing up, wordless and shocked. She clearly remembered his face falling and trying to smile again. He said many words, but she couldn't remember much of it. She was trying to picture something in her head instead but her mind refused to form the images.

All she heard was that he gave her a week to think about it but she already had her answer. Still, she kept it to herself, hoping she would change her mind a week later. He gave the box to her.

Yesterday, she called him on the phone. She was a day early but it didn't matter. She reckoned that if sitting through six days wouldn't change her mind, prolonging it one more day to tell him her decision didn't help at all; it either gave him hope or increased his disappointment.

As she had imagined, he didn't take it too well. His words were laced with frustration, confusion, anger, disappointment and disbelief. _Didn't these three years mean anything to you?_ He asked. Naomi kept quiet; both of them were quiet. She could hear the deafening silence resonating over the line and his shallow breathing. _Sorry._

He asked her what this meant, whether this was too fast and she wanted to wait another year instead. He asked her if it was money she was worried about.

It was nothing like that. Naomi just couldn't see herself with him for the rest of her life. It was that simple and that brutal.

_Let's take a break._

After she said those words and more silence followed, she hung up the phone feeling like the worst person she had ever been and crawled into bed, staying there till this afternoon. She hadn't even called in sick; she had gone awol. She quickly fired a text to her boss.

She pulled off her duvet as it was making her too warm and stared up at the ceiling. Strangely she didn't feel upset or guilty anymore; she thought that the guilt would continue to eat at her, that she would feel like shit even after more than twelve hours of sleep. Instead, she felt a sense of relief, lightness, like something she didn't know that was heavy had slipped off her shoulders. She sat up, feeling like she had just emerged out of the water and was taking the first breath of air in the longest time.

Her phone buzzed indicating a message. He boss acknowledged her absence. Naomi read the text and placed the phone in front of her on the duvet casually.

Her thoughts suddenly snapped to the girl she met last month in Singapore. She had stored her number in her phone immediately when she got back to the hostel that day in case she lost that precious piece of paper. Truthfully, she had been occasionally thinking about the girl, more often than she should. She would catch herself daydreaming about that moment in the rain under the umbrella with the girl's arm wrapped around her waist.

Naomi knew Emily was back in Bristol and had been for at least two weeks but she never had the courage to text her. She actually formed a simple text message the very day she returned to London but stored it as a draft in her phone thinking that maybe Emily wouldn't exactly remember her since she had met many people from the countries she had travelled in and gave her number to others.

When Freddie proposed to her last week, Naomi had an urge to call Emily out of the blue to let her know, to ask her if she should do it. It was a crazy idea; Emily wouldn't give her an answer, and it felt wrong, so she didn't do it. Right now, she had the urge again. This time, it didn't feel wrong to call her but it was still crazy. Half of her heart was chicken shit; the other half was impulsive and irrational.

With one elbow on her knee, propping her head with her hand, she bent her head over her phone, her blonde hair falling messily down her face, and flicked her index finger over the screen, searching. She stared at the tiny characters for a long time. She had been done this before and had chickened out each time.

Her finger hovered precariously over the string of numbers.


	2. Happy Ever After

It's been a while... and most readers and reviewers might have forgotten about this but here it is, a brand new story! I would REALLY like to reply to some reviewers but I can't because you don't have an account, so please get one. And yes **yllod**, you're the only one that guessed the title's from Sigur Ros :)

Thanks for reading, hopefully you enjoyed this (or not).

And this is also for you **mate** before you fly off :)

**Disclaimer: **This is completely unrelated to the actual Skins. Places stated are written as closely accurate as possible but possibly with a huge margin of error. The blanket of fiction covers all inaccuracies of any kind or form. Any semblances to people and real life events are purely coincidental or exaggerated. The use of imagination is much appreciated.

* * *

**Happy Ever After**

Stepping out of the bus, Emily stretched her neck, rolled her shoulders a couple of times and stifled a yawn against the back of her hand. A slight gust of cold wind blew past her, tugging at her thin jacket. Looking around the ground, she spotted her light hand carry bag that the driver had unloaded from the bus, thanked him and headed through the doors and into the station. The first thing she did was to head into the toilet to freshen up.

Travelling overnight on the bus from London to Edinburgh had become a usual thing for the past three months ever since she was put in charge of the operations of a newly opened branch office. She had seriously considered taking up this branch under her care, as she would need to travel three times a month to Edinburgh for a few days each time on top of her other trips around the country. It didn't seem like taking up one more city would be a problem, but for Emily, when she was not travelling, she was spending her remaining time in her office in London, working from morning before the sun rose and to reach home at midnight, take a quick shower and hit the sack. She hardly had any social life or friends to maintain as she was too busy for that.

This was because Emily was the Regional Director of Operations of her company. She had worked very hard to get where she was right now. Being female and only at the age of twenty-nine, she raised eyebrows and endured whispers when she got the job, some declaring she would be a liability than an asset. However she silenced her critics after proving her skills and capabilities. As the office was still fairly new, it required quite a bit of her time up there but as it stabilised, her visits would definitely cut down.

Emily didn't mind the hard work. She always knew that she was a workaholic; even in her days in university which she aced all her exams. She did go to parties and hang out like a normal student did but when she studied, she studied harder than most of her friends would and was known to reject parties even four months before the exams. It was also a wonder how she managed to snag herself a girlfriend.

Turning on the tap, Emily splashed some cool water on her face and dried it with a paper towel. She then proceeded to brush her teeth, comb her hair, apply some light makeup and a bit of perfume before putting on a thicker coat.

Today was a bit special in a couple of ways; she had to make this one-off day trip to the office to handle a few urgent matters and it was also her now wife – Laura and hers third anniversary. Needless to say, Laura wasn't exactly very delighted at this situation. Roughly twelve hours ago, before Emily left for Edinburgh on the bus, they had a heated argument on this. As much as she tried, Emily had no way to pacify Laura as their anniversary was a big deal to her. It fucking sucked that she had to be sent to the office to handle urgent matters on this very day, they couldn't even wait till tomorrow. Emily already promised to return the very next day even though it meant that she had to spend two nights back-to-back sleeping on the bus, but that didn't make the argument between them any better. Emily felt guilty as she already knew what a horrible wife she had been for hardly ever being at home, to also miss their anniversary was just what she didn't need on top of everything.

She took one last look at her reflection in the mirror, exhaled a short breath, pushed her thoughts on their argument away and exited the toilet, walking through the bus station and out into the cold, wet and grey Edinburgh weather.

It was early August and the sky was gloomy. The ground showed evident signs of early morning rain even though it was only slightly past eight in the morning. It was just fucking great; the weather and grey sky was just making Emily feel more miserable. If she were in London, she'd be waking up in the arms of her wife, in their warm bed, sharing wet kisses, feeling like she was the luckiest woman on earth. She shook her head and exhaled another troubled sigh.

Since she was early, she decided to take a slow walk along North Bridge over to the other side where her office was rather than the usual bus.

The wind was cold and biting, like a freshly sharpened knife cutting viscerally into her thick coat, chilling her bones and numbing the skin on her face. She adjusted her scarf around her neck, wrapped her coat tighter around herself and hoisted her day-bag up her shoulder, stuffing her hands into the pockets after. A few people hurrying past accidentally bumped into her yet it didn't bother her much as she was taking in the view of the city. Though she had been here many times in the past few months, she never did slow down to properly enjoy the sights. She never did notice how old some of the buildings are and how much grime and dirt they were covered in. She also never noticed the passing people around her. Some of them looked miserable as she thought she must have looked; she wondered if anyone was also like her, starting the day with a freshly bruised argument in her pocket.

After the slow walk, she finally reached the building her office was located at. Taking another weary sigh, which was one too many for a day that just started, she headed up.

.

.

Being tied up all morning and early afternoon with meetings and issues to handle, she finally escaped the hectic monotony of the office to take a breather and grab something to eat. It was half past three yet the sky was still a depressing shade of slate colour; the ground was still wet and the sun half hidden by the clouds.

She entered the Starbucks joint along High Street and got herself a chocolate croissant and a soy latte. She decided to have it to go, preferring to spend her break out among the people than sit alone and ponder on matters that made her heart ache.

She walked along High Street, treading her heeled boots carefully on the wet cobbled stones, chewing her croissant and occasionally sipping her latte. She was starting to feel a lot better; it could have everything to do with the second cup of coffee she was having.

As she approached the junction along High Street and Parliament Square, she saw handful people gathered sparsely by the pavement on her right. Her ears picked up soft music and a female singing voice as she got nearer. It actually sounded pretty decent; it had a unique tone that she instantly liked. She decided to sit on the third stone boulder to the left of the busker, inconspicuously at a distance and eat her croissant while listening to the song. The busker had her soft guitar case out in front of her; a couple of notes and small change were in it. The guitar she used was quite old, it had chipped at a few places and the light brown surface was pretty scratched, though none of that seemed to affect her skills.

… _It's even harder to picture,  
That you're not here next to me.  
You say it's too late to make it,  
But is it too hard to try? …_

Emily scoffed. She recognised the song – mainstream stuff that was on the radio all the time. When she first heard the song, she disliked it as her initial logical thought was that the song didn't make sense because most people hardly use payphones anymore. But right now, she had to hand it to the busker, she was making the song her own, making it sound even better than the original. She was using a palm-mute technique for the verse; it was impressive as Emily once learned how to play guitar in school but never really got the hang of it.

… _Now I'm paralyzed,  
Still stuck in that time  
When we called it love,  
But even the sun sets in paradise …_

Her thought's automatically flashed to Laura.

… _All of my change I spent on you.  
Where have the times gone  
Baby it's all wrong,  
Where are the plans we made for two? …_

A wave of nostalgia hit Emily as the words of the song suddenly hit her. A torrent of memories of how happy they used to be flooded her mind. Back in the university she was always in the shadows and she only kept her head down and studied hard. It was only when she had dyed her hair red on an impulse and met Laura at a party in her final year that things just took off from there. Laura was her first. They dated for three years and those years were the happiest days in her life. They boldly built plans, dreamy ones, wild ones, passionate ones, realistic ones, but Emily didn't know if the plans were for real until Laura asked Emily to marry her. Three years later, she felt like the plans have all gone wrong.

… _You can't expect me to be fine,  
I don't expect you to care  
I know I've said it before,  
But all of our bridges burned down …_

They were not fine. Ever since she got this job two years back, their relationship started to go pear-shaped. Emily worked far too hard and way too late for Laura's liking. They had countless of heated arguments over this. Emily thought Laura knew, knew what she was like when she worked hard; Laura should have known this when she met her in university, that once she actually had to literally sit naked on Emily's face before she got the hint and put down her book. It didn't mean Emily didn't enjoy herself in those days; she had mind-blowing sex with Laura each time. But Emily worked hard because she was really achieving something and because she wanted them to have enough. She thought Laura _knew_ her when they married, like actuallyfully _knew _what she is. Now, doubt was laced over her thoughts.

… _If happy ever after did exist,  
I would still be holding you like this  
And all those fairytales are full of shit,  
One more fucking love song I'll be sick.  
Now I'm at the payphone._

Perhaps their happy ever after was short lived. She forgot when it was the last time she properly held her wife and made passionate love to her. It was too long, too angry and too weary. Yet Emily also knew it was partly her fault as Laura's words resounded again in her mind, _"You love your work more than you love me." _It was not true; Emily just wanted Laura to be more understanding.

The song had ended when Emily was still mulling over her thoughts, her fingers absent-mindedly twisting the wedding ring on her finger. There were no claps from the passing people, just the sound of a passing gust of wind and a jumble of footsteps; everyone just continued on with their lives, unaffected. Emily had unconsciously finished her croissant. She crumpled the paper bag in her hand and stuffed it into her coat pocket.

_Maybe I should call Laura,_ Emily thought, after all it was their anniversary. She wanted to hear her voice; she hoped Laura wasn't still mad at her.

Emily stood up and took out a ten from her wallet. As the busker was tuning her guitar, she approached the opened guitar case, lightly placed the note in it, turned and prepared to walk away, planning to call Laura on her way back to the office.

"Cheers mate! You keep that head up and call the person you're missing."

Emily spun around surprised. The busker flashed a genuine and cheery smile right at her. Emily nodded and returned a weak smile, barely making eye contact, muttering a quiet word of thanks and hurried away. The sound of chords started up; that was the last thing Emily heard as she took out her phone.

Her thumb dialled the shape of calling home that she knew by heart and placed the phone at her ear. After five rings it went into voicemail. Emily cursed under her breath and hit the redial. It went to voicemail again. She contemplated leaving a message but couldn't think of what she wanted to say. _It was never this hard talking to Laura._ She hung up, pissed. _Could Laura be ignoring my calls?_ She thought furiously. _No, she's probably busy at work, _she rationalised. She bit her lip, trying to control a torrent of emotions from threatening to overtake her mind.

She stuffed her phone back in her pocket and steered herself in the direction of her office, her heart wearier and heavier than before.

.

.

Emily unlocked the front door of her apartment and stepped in. She tossed her keys into the holder by the door, dropped her bag and stepped out of her boots.

She was exhausted, having taken the overnight bus back to London but as soon as she arrived at Victoria, she immediately took the tube back to her apartment, yearning to see her wife. Laura hadn't called her back and Emily was annoyed but she missed her wife more than she could stay mad at her.

"Laura?" Emily called out into the seemingly empty apartment as she took off her coat. It was the weekend; she couldn't be at work or out; it was far too early for that.

"Emily?" A tiny voice called her name.

Then she saw Laura standing by the door of their bedroom wearing her lilac coloured night slip. Her hazel brown hair was slightly dishevelled as though she'd just woken up but her blue eyes were wide open, alert, expecting, like she hadn't slept at all.

They erased the space between them in a few strides and crashed their lips against each other hungrily and urgently. Emily had fucking missed Laura's lips and the way Laura felt in her arms.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Laura whispered repeatedly, sounding almost despairingly, between kisses.

"'Sokay," Emily muttered back. She forgave her that easily. People get mad and do stupid things to hurt the other person but to move forward, one had to forgive the other easily; it came easily to Emily because she loved Laura.

She felt Laura tug the front of her shirt, urging her forwards; Emily had no doubt what was soon to follow. She backed Laura into their room, never once breaking their frantic kisses. As soon as they got through the door, Emily swung her leg and nudged the door shut.

The curtains were half drawn and their bed looked slept in. The back of Laura's knees touched the side of the bed and Emily gently laid her down, breaking their kiss. Laura crawled backwards until her body was fully on the bed.

"Come here." It was almost a command as Laura's words were low and laced with want, unadulterated lust written all over her face.

Without a shred of hesitancy, Emily put her knee on the bed and climbed in on all fours as she slowly crawled her way up, her eyes relishing how sexy Laura looked and how unbridled and erect her nipples were under her slip. It's been so long since they had sex but Emily could feel herself getting very turned on at the sight of her gorgeous wife.

Laura pulled at Emily's shirt again with more urgency and reconnected their lips; this time their kisses were a lot sloppier as their tongues flicked against each other's. Without a warning Emily's shirt had all the buttons undone and Laura was slipping the shirt off her shoulders. Emily slightly lifted herself up as she shed the shirt and Laura's hands immediately made their way to Emily's bra hook. In a heartbeat, it was undone and her bra was discarded to the side. The rest of her clothing followed suit very shortly.

Emily grabbed hold of the hem of Laura's slip and lifted it up and over her head in one swift motion, flinging it behind her head. Her mouth ran dry. The sight of her wife's naked form never failed to stun her. She felt herself get extremely wet as she took in the sexy curve of her hips, her flat and toned stomach, her perky and heaving breasts and immaculately trimmed sex. Her fingers immediately slipped into Laura's core and found the wet sticky heat that was there as well.

"No." Laura pulled her hand away and flipped Emily over without breaking a beat. "Let me make love to you," she breathed into her ear.

Emily stared into Laura's blue eyes as Laura kissed her. A shiver rattled through her body as she closed her eyes and felt Laura slowly kiss a wandering line of wet kisses down her body and settle between her legs.

.

.

Emily pushed away a bit of her hair from her face that was slightly damp from perspiration. She snuggled backwards into Laura who was spooning her from behind. They'd just come down from the extreme height of lovemaking and she was still feeling a little breathless. The lack of sex with Laura for months had made Emily insatiable and Laura seemed to mirror that hunger as well. It felt good to feel wrapped up in her arms once again. Maybe they still had a lot to sort out between themselves but in this moment, it felt like they were back to normal, worry-free, problem-free, and closed off from the real world for just this once. Emily missed this so much; she had missed Laura.

"I love you." Emily said, out into the space in front, knowing Laura heard her.

She felt Laura take a deep breath beside her ear. "I'm sorry," she said, "I won't do that again – won't ignore your calls."

Emily nodded. "We'll figure this out, won't we?" She said, almost sounding a little pleading.

Laura nodded this time.

Emily exhaled an assured sigh. She'd take this.

"Did you change your perfume?" Emily asked, detected a slightly different flowery scent.

"You like it?"

Emily sniffed again. "Think I prefer the old one."

There was a slight pause.

"Me too. I'll change back to it."

Laura tightened her arms around Emily and they drifted off to sleep together, for the first time in a long time.

* * *

Emily stepped out Edinburgh's bus station. Out of habit, she checked her watch again, even though she knew roughly what time it was having taken the same overnight bus many times. She stretched, feeling a little more tired then usual as she kept waking up due to the passenger beside her who kept shifting. Her stomach rumbled and she decided she should get a proper breakfast before heading to the office.

"_Hey, you there!"_

Emily turned her head curiously in the direction of the voice she assumed was addressing her. About five metres from where she was, a sort of familiar face was standing by the wall near the exit of the station with a bright acknowledging smile on the face. Emily cocked her head a little, recollecting where she saw this person.

Then she remembered; it was the same busker which she dropped money into her case a month ago. Emily gave an awkward tentative smile, the kind like a shy upward twitch of her lip that one gives to strangers whom they've never met. She never knew what she was actually to do or react after being hailed by a stranger. Luckily the girl made the first move.

The girl walked up to her with the same bright smile never faltering. She was half a head taller than her. She was wearing a pair of faded baggy light blue jeans that was ripped on the right kneecap, a red flannel shirt underneath a distressed brown leather jacket and really battered up back converse shoes. Behind her slung the very same guitar case Emily recognised.

"You the one that dropped that ten in my case yeah?" The girl beamed, her voice was as clear as the day, effortless, breezy. Emily noticed just how strikingly crystal blue the girl's eyes were. They looked almost like Laura's, almost too similar, but this girl's eyes were brighter, more captivating. It really matched her peroxide blonde hair that she tied up in a messy ponytail.

"Erm, yeah I think I'm the one." Emily confirmed, still feeling a little awkward and stunned.

"Yeah thought so." The girl scratched the back of her neck and a few more stray hairs fell out of her ponytail. "Recognised you right away. What brings you here again for a few days?"

Emily was taken aback at how the girl knew she just arrived. "Er I… How did you know I –" Emily stammered.

"Your small bag, hardly looks like a holiday to me, probably two or three days." The girl grinned, looking smug.

"Right." Emily felt sheepish. "Sorry, not thinking right now, bit knackered. Gonna grab a bite before heading to work." She didn't think this bit of information to a complete stranger was an overshare.

"Great! I actually know of a really good place where you can get fantastic breakfast. You had Scottish breakfast before?" The girl asked happily.

"I sure I did but where's the place?" All the talk about breakfast was getting her mouth watering; she was actually starving after the ride and could do with a good meal.

"Come on I'll bring you there, it's pretty hard to find."

"No no it's fine I'll just get something along the way instead. Don't want to trouble you." Emily said alarmed. "You seem to be starting to…" Emily trailed off failing to find the right word to replace "busk".

"You're not," the girl interjected. "Reckon I'll get me some breakfast too. So what'd ya say?" The girl's blue eyes twinkled at hers and Emily can't help thinking how pretty and kind they were. Emily was usually hesitant towards people, especially to people she hardly knew. However she found herself voluntarily opening up to this friendly girl, whom she once heard her sing, gave money to and started chatting to her, offering to bring her to a fantastic breakfast place. It really didn't seem like a bad idea. She was hungry, she had some time to spare and the girl didn't look like she was a secret dangerous gangster who was going to rob her; it was a no brainer.

"Okay," Emily flashed a grateful smile.

"Awesome." The girl started walking and Emily quickly fell into step. "I'm Naomi by the way."

"Emily."

"Nice to meet you Emily." Naomi said sincerely.

"How far's the breakfast place anyway?" Emily asked.

Naomi scrunched up her nose and lifted her head in thought. "Hmm, probably a ten minute stroll. Five if you're really hungry."

Emily broke into an honest laugh, one that she hadn't really had in ages. She liked this girl already. Naomi smirked at her.

Naomi hummed sporadically and good-naturedly to herself as they looked out for traffic and crossed the road.

They passed by St Andrew's Square and a gust of wind blew at them, making Emily's coat flap open.

"It's always so cold here." Emily commented; her teeth chattering as her hands fumbled while buttoning up her coat.

"Ah we're used to it," Naomi smiled, gesturing at her simple jacket.

"Are you Scottish?" Emily asked. "I mean, your accent doesn't really sounds like one but then again from the way you pronounce some words –"

"I'm from London – or was, but I've been living here for over two years so I guess my accent's become a little screwed up now." Naomi winked at her cheerily, deliberately emphasising her modified Scottish accent.

"So why did you move here?"

"My mom died a while back, then my boyfriend got a job here so I moved over with him. But he broke up with me after a while, changed jobs and moved away. I liked it here so I stayed as there's nothing left in London to go back to." Naomi said nonchalantly like she had repeated this many times. Somehow she kept her eyes away from Emily, looking at the street instead.

"Gee, I'm sorry" Emily said automatically. She really was.

"No worries, been ages ago. Not too bummed about that. Life still goes on, I suppose." Naomi replied airily, with another smile on her face but this time Emily could see a slight cloud over her features. "And here we are! That's gonna be in record time; you must be hungry." Naomi gave a cheeky grin at her, their topic effectively coming to an end. Emily found herself looking at a small shop with beige walls and blue letterings that read 'Snax Café'.

Naomi pushed open the door and stepped in with Emily following closely behind. A cacophony of shouts and greetings ensued.

Emily looked around in amazement at the tiny shop as Naomi greeted the people behind the counter, apparently being well acquainted with them. The only tables were bar counters that either faced the counter, the wall or looked out of the glass window into the street. Even so, the only sitting area could hold a maximum of ten customers with half the shop used up for the counter and stoves behind and a section of food and drinks to go. Something good was sizzling and smoking on the stove. Emily's mouth watered. She liked the place immediately, it was cosy in the nonconventional way; a place one would walk right pass and not really give a thought about it; Naomi was right, she would never have found this place.

"Emily!" Naomi gently tugged her arm, bringing Emily's wandering eyes back on herself. "This is Hannah and Sally." Naomi casually pointed at two jolly women behind the counter. They were both wearing a white apron, grinning cheerfully and waved at her.

"Good to see you Emily!" The one called Hannah said. She was a pleasantly pump woman with black hair neatly tied up.

"Nice to meet you too," Emily returned.

"Effy!" The other lady, Sally, turned back and yelled. "Say hello to Naomi's friend!" Suddenly Emily got upgraded from a 'stranger' status to a 'friend' status within seconds; she didn't mind that.

Both of them behind the counter turned a fraction and Emily saw a tall, skinny brunette girl at the stove flipping away. The brunette turned her head. Emily was once again met with another set of blue eyes, different from Laura's, different from Naomi's, but it was aloof unlike Naomi's friendly ones. The eyes gave her a once over, as though she was being scrutinized and x-rayed in the quickest time. The girl nodded once and turned her eyes back to the stove.

"Don't mind Eff, she can be a bit cold at first but she's a great once you know her." Naomi shrugged, looking slightly apologetic.

"What would you ladies like to have?" Hannah addressed them.

Emily looked up at the menu that was stuck on the wall. There was a long list of items. There were burgers and chips, baguettes with fillings, toasties, hot dogs, porridge… the list goes on. There was also an 'All Day Breakfast' option, "The Bigger Breakfast' option and 'The Biggest Breakfast' option, which had everything the previous two breakfasts had and more. Emily couldn't decide with the abundance of choices; she wanted to eat everything.

"Fuck, I hope you're not vegetarian." Naomi's voice suddenly burst through her thoughts, looking slightly alarmed. "They have the Veggie Breakfast but I reckon it won't be the same." Apparently she must have looked lost staring at the menu.

Emily chuckled, "No, I actually want to eat everything here."

Naomi looked relieved. "Why not? You could get The Biggest Breakfast. They've everything, bacon, haggis, black pudding… all that awesome stuff."

"Uh I've not actually tried Haggis ever since I was a kid. I remember hating the taste." Emily scrunched up her face and gave a slight shake of her head. "And black pudding's not really my type of food either."

"The one they do is great. You should try it again; probably you'll like it. Come on, everything twice." Naomi eyed her up challengingly and winked.

"Well… the Biggest Breakfast sounds like a lot…"

"We could share. I mean, it's large enough for two, if you don't mind, so you'd get a bit of everything." Naomi offered, though, looking a bit unsure at her suggestion.

"That sounds great! One The Biggest Breakfast!" Emily directed it at Hannah.

"Aye! Biggest Breakfast!" Hannah yelled at Effy, who responded by the sound of a fresh sizzle on the stove. "That'll be four pounds forty, love."

"I'll get this." Emily reached for her wallet. She really couldn't let Naomi pay after she introduced her to this fantastic place. Plus, she was certain she earned much more than Naomi. Not that she was looking down on Naomi but busking surely wouldn't fetch the pay she was getting, and she really wanted to thank Naomi for this.

"No way! Can't let you do that." Naomi looked positively mortified, digging about her pockets for her money.

"I insist Naomi. Thanks for bringing me to this place."

"Can't do that. It'll be like I'm bumming a free meal off you." Naomi frowned, unwilling to back down, pulling out a couple of crumpled notes. She bit her lip. "At least let me buy you a drink."

"Deal." Emily smiled. "What do you recommend?"

"I'd say their hot chocolate. It's the best." Naomi's face lit up as she mentioned it. "Two hot chocolate. Make'em large!" She addressed Hannah and pulled out a bunch of coins from her pocket and started to count them before placing them on the counter.

They took the seats on the high chairs by the counter that was facing the glass window, looking out into the street. A short comfortable silence fell over them as Emily listened to the sizzle from the stove, the smell of meat and the chatting behind the counter.

"So how long have you been married?" Naomi asked out of the blue.

Emily was startled how Naomi knew this; then she remembered she was wearing her ring. "Three years," she replied, her mind instantly thinking about her wife. She realised she hadn't once thought about Laura till now.

"That day, when you dropped the tip, did you just had a fight with him? I mean, sorry, it's none of my business… forget what I said." Naomi looked flustered, clearly thinking she shouldn't have asked such personal questions.

Emily shook her head dismissing her apology. "How did you know we fought?" Emily asked in disbelief wondering whether this girl was actually some kind of psychic. It wasn't exactly a 'fight' but it was close and she didn't need to explain that to her.

"Well it's not like someone drops a ten everyday and looked really upset doing that." Naomi said, looking as though that was the only suitable explanation.

"Yeah." Emily fell silent, thinking back to the very day. They were okay now, weren't they? For some reason, that day stayed in her mind. A couple is supposed to move past situations like that after they've forgiven each other yet it still stayed fresh in her mind no matter how hard she tried to erase it.

"I did. But her phone was off."

"Her?"

"Yeah." Emily saw Naomi's quizzical look. "Oh yeah, my wife," she simply said.

Naomi's mouth had formed into a small O, a mildly surprised look on her blue eyes. Emily reckoned that in this light, the colour of Naomi's eye almost looked like the colour of Laura's. _Almost._

The look of surprise faded away and a genuine happy smile materialised; Naomi's blue eyes pierced into hers. Emily found herself staring back intently at the beautiful blue irises.

"Hot chocolate, ladies." Sally cut in between them and placed two large cups on the counter. "Biggest Breakfast coming up!"

They said their thanks and took small sips from their cup. The hot chocolate was really good, thick, creamy and with a strong chocolate fragrance.

"You both made up already I hope." Naomi asked, pursuing the same topic again. Emily could see she was honestly concerned.

"Yeah we did. We still have our differences of course, and I'm very much to be blamed…" Emily muttered the last few words more to herself. "But we're working it out and it's better – good," she ended, feeling like she was convincing herself instead. They were good now; in a better place then before and that was assuring.

"You love her," Naomi stated.

"I do." Emily said slowly nodding, her eyes drawn to the small bubbles in the foam of the hot chocolate as she took another sip.

"But?"

Her eyes snapped to Naomi's ones that were fixated on her, boring into her own brown eyes, like she was trying to read everything in her mind. She had never been questioned on this; it made her uncomfortable yet sentences that hadn't taken once thought of uttering threatened to burst out of her heart.

"But…" She started, truthfully, stalling.

"But you feel that the spark that was once there is gone, or it could still be there but you're not feeling it lately and you don't know what's wrong. You try to fix it but it's making you feel like shit that you don't know how to. You still love her and it's killing you because you can't do anything about it." Naomi finished, looking dead seriously into Emily's eyes.

Emily heart was beating right out of her chest; she felt that the shop was suddenly too small and it was squeezing her insides. How could someone whom she has only met twice, just taken one good look at her and exchanged a few random sentences, just easily blurted out everything that she had been trying to figure out or say for the previous months? Naomi didn't know her yet how could she see through her like she was a transparent piece of fragile glass?

"The Biggest Breakfast. Enjoy ladies!" Sally placed a large plate between them and two sets of cutlery, apparently oblivious to what just happened.

Emily took a deep breath, grateful for the distraction. She tucked a stray lock of brown hair behind her ear trying to steady herself.

"Wow it looks delicious." Emily said with deflated enthusiasm, abruptly changing the topic. It actually smelled really good but her mind was caught in a wildly spinning carousel right now.

"Oh yes," Naomi followed suit, changing like an erratic weather, slipping back to her airy tone. "Told ya it was big enough for two." She picked up the knife and fork, ready to dig in.

Emily watched Naomi split everything on the plate right into half; half of the tattie scone, fried egg, hash brown, black pudding, haggis, fried tomato, buttered roll, bacon, one sausage, and if she could, Emily reckoned Naomi would divide the baked beans equally.

"Go on," Naomi gestured at the food with the fork.

She was famished, everything tasted delicious. They sat chewing silently for a bit, avoiding each other's eyes, or rather it was Emily's avoiding Naomi's.

"How'd you know?" Emily said after she swallowed, letting the first words she thought fly out of her mouth. "That my wife and I…" She trailed off and immediately placed a piece of sausage in her mouth like she was shutting herself up from spilling more.

"I don't. I just guessed, you know, get'em from tv shows, books…" she shrugged. "Gee I'm sorry." Her blue eyes were apologetic as they sincerely looked into Emily's. "It's none of my business."

Emily's face must have looked miserably sad. She shook her head. "Don't be, it's okay. It's just that no one ever put it so plainly and clearly before me like that… not even myself." She sounded sadder than she meant to be. Naomi nodded.

They continued to eat silently for a bit, none of them knowing what to say after that but it wasn't uncomfortable, the food was helping them communicate silently.

"You should try the haggis. The ones here are great." Naomi pointed at the lump of meat untouched at Emily's side of the plate.

"Uh…" Emily carefully cut a tiny piece and gingerly placed it in her mouth, chewing it thoroughly. "Ew," she made a horrified face, swallowing it in a hurry and taking a sip from her cup.

Naomi giggled, "It's not that bad!"

"Still don't like it! You can have the rest. Take the black pudding too." Emily waved at the plate dramatically.

"I'll swop with you," Naomi grinned, exchanging her untouched scone and hash brown with Emily's haggis and black pudding before she could protest.

Emily watched as Naomi tucked happily into the haggis, making satisfied chewing noises. Naomi looked so much more youthful, carefree and without worry unlike herself. Although she didn't ask, she reckoned Naomi should be around her age or younger and she assumed Naomi didn't have a proper job but she was so much happier than she was. It was then that she quietly admitted to herself that she was indeed not as happy as she used to or wanted to be.

They finished the food and hot chocolate. It was already ten past nine and Emily had to be heading to the office now.

She hopped off the high chair and pulled on her coat, feeling much more full and satisfied. This was starting to be a good day and that was because she had met an unexpected stranger that lit up her morning like a brightly shinning unblemished sun.

"I gotta go now," Emily said.

"I'm just gonna hang around here for a bit first." Naomi said, not getting off her chair.

"Oh okay, sure."

"I really hope you work things out with your wife." Naomi replied. She really looked like she meant it.

"Thanks I really hope so too." Emily looked at her boots. She realised she didn't know if she would see Naomi again. Call it strange but she felt a certain easy connection with this complete stranger that she had only interacted with for an hour. She would like to actually get to know Naomi better as a friend; she figured she could do with more people like that in her life, especially the ones that seemed to understand what she never expressed, an unexpected telepathy. "So… when will I see you again?" Emily asked hopefully.

"I'll see you when we meet again." Naomi said with another one of her cheery smiles. "Take care Emily, you keep that head up."

Emily broke into a smile remembering that Naomi said this to her before. "You too."

She exchanged her goodbyes with Sally and Hannah, receiving another nod from Effy and exited the shop. The sky was clear for once, the ground was dry and there was decent warmth in the air; it could be the heat from her full breakfast, or just the fact that the day started off great with the unexpected gracious warmth from a stranger.

Naomi and her didn't exchange numbers yet somewhere deep down Emily knew she would see Naomi again. She knew she just would.

* * *

_I'm here without you baby,  
But you're still on my lonely mind.  
I think about you baby,  
And I dream about you all the time…_

Emily heard the familiar voice and guitar strings from a distance. She whipped her head immediately in the direction of the music and her face broke into an uninhibited smile.

She was walking along Princes Street just by Princes Street Gardens. She caught sight of the familiar figure with her guitar. A sudden relief and elation overwhelmed her. Though this was only the third time bumping into Naomi, she felt undeniably happy to see her; it was as though she bumped into a long lost friend.

After their spontaneous breakfast together the last time, Emily hadn't seen Naomi for the next two times she came to Edinburgh. She certainly was looking out for a certain blonde at the bus station or at High Street and was slightly disappointed for not meeting her. This time, Naomi was plainly obvious busking on Princes Street. It was as though she purposely chose an easy place for Emily to find her or she was deliberately making it hard for Emily to guess her next spot; not that Emily was hunting about for her anyway.

She quietly approached Naomi, trying not to distract her, smiling as she spotted a number of coins and a couple of notes in her case. Naomi was still in the middle of the song but when she saw her, her eyes shone happily and the corner of her mouth twitched up like she was trying to smile as she sang. She was in a pair of baggy dark blue jeans, a think grey sweater with the same brown leather jacket and converse shoes; her blonde hair was straight and let down this time, curling slightly at her shoulders.

Emily stood motionless, listening intently to Naomi's voice and her singing, with a small smile on her lips. Naomi sang mostly with her eyes closed but a couple of times, she opened them and made brief eye contact with her during the song. The blue hue of her eyes sparkled, conveying the emotion of the song. Emily was sucked willing into the moment. She really did have a lovely voice.

_I'm here without you baby,  
But you're still with me in my dreams.  
And tonight girl, it's only you and me…_

Emily gave a few claps of applause when Naomi ended the song and gave a short bent of her head for a bow, her cheeks looking freshly pink.

"Hey you." Naomi greeted cheerily, slinging her guitar behind her back and reaching for her bottle of water.

"I never told you this but you sing very well." Emily immediately said, not bothering with a proper greeting. Though it was her third time speaking to Naomi, she felt very comfortable, like they were old friends. Except that they were not.

Naomi's ears turned red as she hastily swallowed the water. "Thanks. I never told you this but you have a very lovely voice too." Her cheeks turned even redder after that.

"Well I have been told that many times." Emily replied confidently with a bright smile.

"Yeah it's husky and all that… pretty unique. How are you? Haven't seen you for a bit." Naomi changed the topic.

"I've actually been back a couple of times already. Didn't see you around too."

"Oh yeah okay." Naomi shrugged nonchalantly.

"Where do you usually play at?" Emily asked curiously. She wondered which are the places she could meet the girl.

"Here and there, you know, a bit everywhere. I don't know myself. I just decide wherever I feel like." Naomi grinned.

"Oh." Emily tried not to sound disappointed because she shouldn't; they weren't like friends meeting each other or anything like that.

"So how are things with you and wifey?" Naomi asked casually, concerned.

"Fine. Good, I think." Emily shrugged. They were fine, or good, at least they hardly quarrelled anymore; it was good.

"Great," she smiled genuinely.

Emily looked at her watch and sighed. "Actually I have to go grab some stuff before I head back to London." She somehow felt she wanted to have a conversation with Naomi but time was not on her side, nor was fate.

"Don't let me be holding you up." Naomi said with another smile, slinging her guitar back in front.

Emily paused, remembering something, and pulled out her wallet.

"No!" Naomi waved her hand at her, reading her intentions. "Don't. I can't accept this."

"But I want to. You play really well." Emily protested, holding a ten already in her palm.

"Friends don't give friends money." Naomi said shortly.

Emily did a double take, a slow smile spread across her lips. Naomi frowned at the note still in Emily's hand, apparently not realising what she just said, or maybe it wasn't surprising to her because she actually meant it. She hardly had any friends and she reckoned she definitely could have Naomi as one. Emily stuffed the note back into her wallet a little grudgingly but accepting this.

"But I appreciate this, Emily." Naomi said, her blue eyes twinkling brightly.

"I will see you again, won't I? Emily said, half turning to go.

"Definitely." Naomi gave a wink as she strummed a random chord, as if signalling the end of their conversation.

.

.

"Laura I'm home." Emily announced as she stepped through her front door.

Laura's head popped out of their bedroom door, evidently surprised. She walked out, her fingers cradled around her ear, putting on her earrings. She was wearing a fitting V-necked red dress that showed off her curves; it looked like she was going out soon.

"I thought you were coming back later?" She pecked Emily's lips and gave a small smile.

"I took an earlier bus back. Wanted to surprise you." Emily held up a bottle of wine she bought. "But it seems like you're going somewhere?"

"Yeah I – erm, have dinner plans with Rachel. Haven't seen her for a bit… but I could cancel and make some dinner for you?" Laura offered.

Emily detected a slight undertone of reluctance from her and she didn't want Laura to oblige. "It's okay babe, you go out and have fun with Rachel. I'll just order some Chinese take-away."

"Excellent!" Laura exclaimed and swept up her woollen brown coat from the sofa and slipped it on. "I'll be back late, don't stay up and wait." And with that she briefly kissed Emily's lips and strode out of the front door so fast that Emily was left only with the ghost of Laura's kiss and her faint scent of perfume that barely lingered.

Emily frowned a little and shrugged at the abruptness, feeling slightly disappointed. Though she had let Laura go out, she initially had thought that by coming home early, she could have dinner with her. Sulking a little, she flopped on the sofa, reached for her phone and ordered some food. Snuggling into the smooth creases in the sofa, she turned on the television and started her early night with old reruns.

* * *

She sat a little unsteadily on the high stool by the bar. She squeezed her eyes tightly once and opened them; her eyes were trying to focus on the pint of ale on the counter. Both her hands clutched the wet glass that was anchored to the counter top. Seconds later, she lifted the glass and downed the last mouthful of lukewarm ale, slamming the glass onto the counter a littler harder than usual and swallowing the ale with a cringe.

"Another one," Emily raised her index finger to the barman who nodded mutely.

"Take it easy mate," the blonde haired girl sitting next to her said.

"I'm not drunk," Emily retorted, a little too fiercely.

"Never said you were… though people that say that usually are." Naomi chuckled light-heartedly.

Emily frowned as though trying to process what Naomi just said. She waved to the barman again and pointed at Naomi's empty glass, "Get another one for her."

"No it's okay," Naomi cut in, dismissing the barman.

"But you only had one drink."

"And you had four."

"My treat."

"This drink is already your treat."

"So I'll treat you again. One more for her." Emily addressed the barman again in a final tone.

They sipped their drinks in silence again. Emily was on a mission to lose control of herself tonight with alcohol. There were so much repressed feelings in her that she couldn't express. She felt like there was a whole ocean bottled up in her chest, thrashing wildly, turbulent, dark and sinking. She couldn't figure out if there was anything wrong or whether she was just being oversensitive. It was tormenting her. She couldn't get her head out of the depths.

So she escaped to Edinburgh one day ago and mercifully found Naomi busking at the same spot on High Street. Emily hadn't seen her for two months yet she knew she must have looked a state as Naomi stopped mid-song and suggested to bring her to a bar, her face worried with concern.

Now after three pints and barely any conversation, they sat there idling the night away. Naomi sat quietly, staring emptily at the arrangement of bottles behind the counter apparently lost in thought too.

"I don't know what happened." Emily broke the silence, her voice feeling hoarse.

Naomi had turned her head and faced Emily, giving her full attention yet Emily faced steadfastly forward, slowly gathering her words, trying to verbalise the emotions bottled up inside.

"It's like she suddenly closed up, cut herself off, and became cold… like I feel there's a distance between us. I have tried to come home early, to take day offs, cut down on business trips – but it's like she's drifting away. Sometimes I think I'm just being sensitive because she still kisses me and tells me she misses me but… it doesn't feel the same anymore." Emily poured out everything she had been holding in.

She felt a surge of bitter tears pushing at the back of her throat and swallowed it in. She shouldn't cry in front of Naomi whom she only met four times, yet she felt a certain comfortableness with her to lay her heart's deepest troubles bare. There was something about the soulful blue eyes that were looking at her with gentle care.

Emily buried her face in her hands, her fingertips digging painfully into the flesh. "I don't know how to sort this out. I feel like I'm losing her. I – I can't lose her." Her heart pounded wildly in fearful realisation. "I've worked hard for her. I built my life with her – around her."

Naomi placed a warm hand on Emily's shoulder. "Talk to her? Let her know what you feel?"

"I'm afraid that it's all in my head, that we are actually fine. When she looks at me, I still see that she loves me but, it's not the same anymore." She shook her head in anguish. "I tried to change, give more time to her – what if, I'm not enough for her?" She swallowed thickly. "I –"

The last thing she saw was Naomi's face looming up, closing small the distance between them. Her eyelids fluttered close as she felt a pair of soft warm lips press gently against hers. She took a sharp breath, breathing in Naomi's strangely pleasant scent. A tangible jolt of electricity burst through her body, instantly sobering her up. The heaviness on her heart suddenly lifted and she could suddenly breathe. Naomi retreated, as quickly as she had advanced.

"Wha – I –" Emily unintelligently rambled.

"Fuck. Sorry, I shouldn't have done that." Naomi's face turned slightly red. "But you just looked so fucking miserable. You are enough, Emily. You're kind, generous, hardworking, faithful, loving – I'm sure she knows it. She's lucky to have you. You are enough for her."

"You don't know that. You don't know me well enough. How can you say that?" Emily whispered hoarsely, feeling herself almost close to tears.

"You're right, I don't. But I always believe there's a kindness in everyone; you are generous to me – someone you hardly know; you work hard for your family; and you love her so much. I'm sure I'm right for all these things." Naomi's eyes gazed honestly into her tearful brown ones. "Get home, talk to her. You two can work things out together. Fight hard and hold on to the people you treasure."

Emily realised she had to fight for things she believed in and loved. Sitting in a bar and sobbing about uncertainties didn't solve problems; facing them headfirst did. And Naomi helped her to see that Emily had given as much as she could to this life she had built with Laura.

She found a blaze of hope, lighting the pathway that was ignited by this miraculously God-sent girl. It wasn't everyday that one meets someone like Naomi who seems to find the positive side of life.

"I will," Emily said heavily, finding herself much more calm now. She stood up decidedly, feeling less wobbly and quite clear-headed, leaving her half-drunk pint behind. "I should get home soon. Thank you, Naomi."

"I didn't do anything. You go back and fix things up with her yeah," Naomi smiled.

As Emily turned to leave, she remembered something. "Oh right, could you give me your number, so – you know, instead of blindly searching the city for you, we could arrange to meet again?" Emily said, feeling a little embarrassed and dependant but to hell with it, she realised she needed Naomi as a proper friend.

Naomi paused for a while then chuckled and winked mischievously, "The city's not that big if you know where to find me aye. Unfortunately I don't have a mobile but I could give you Effy's, should you need to contact me urgently." With that, she unearthed a pen out of her guitar case and wrote the number on the back of the slightly damp coaster under her glass. "There you go! With a souvenir from Scotland too." She beamed happily at her gift.

Emily felt her spirits lift. Truly this girl is one amazing person. Naomi's smile seemed to have this uplifting effect on her.

"Take care Emily." Naomi stood up and wrapped her arms around her petite frame.

Emily threw her arms around Naomi. Naomi squeezed her as tight as she could as though she was trying to transmit all the energy, optimism and assuredness into her body. Naomi felt so warm and comforting. Emily breathed in deeply and committed to memory a faint flowery scent that was wholly Naomi. She felt a sense of peace and hope that she hadn't felt for months. Emily desperately wanted to linger in her presence for just a bit.

They finally let go.

"So I'll see you around?" Emily said hopefully.

"I'll see you when we meet again." Naomi replied with that same phrase again with a final smile.

Emily exited the bar and rushed off to the bus station to book the next earliest bus back to London. She had to make things right.

.

.

A pair of unfamiliar shoes sprawled untidily by the front door. Emily swept them to one side with her foot and kicked off her shoes. She was exhausted; she couldn't sleep on the bus back, as her mind was constantly thinking about how she was going to fix their relationship.

Two empty wine glasses were on the coffee table. Emily frowned, puzzled; it was barely nine in the morning. She slipped off her coat and tossed it on the arm of the sofa. She shifted the slanted sofa back into place, picked the two wine glasses and entered the kitchen. Another two sets of unwashed plates and cutlery were in the basin.

Her thoughts began to spin wildly and colourfully. Her heart started to hammer loudly in her ears as she placed the glasses on the counter and padded quietly out of the kitchen. She moved with a restrained hesitancy out of the kitchen, past the edge of the living room, heading to her master bedroom. Her eyes were fixated on the dark wooden door that was innocuously closed.

And her ears picked it up.

An ice-cold sensation spread through her veins like an injection, from the frantic beating of her heart all the way to the tips of her fingers. Her legs moved on autopilot, cruising her body involuntarily to the door. Her arm was raised; hand grips the doorknob tightly and turns smoothly with a constrained steadiness.

A scream – not hers. Flurry of movement.

Emily's eyes were wide open, taking in everything. Her ears were ringing as her eyes notate lips mouthing words at her that she couldn't hear. She stood frozen as a dead statue by the doorway for another fleeting number of seconds before turning, with a zombie-like demeanour, systematically putting one foot in front of her and walking right back the way she came. She barely could feel the blood rushing out of her. Her face was pale yet it was devoid of all expression or emotion, like someone who's had it's soul sucked out of their being.

The next thing she remembered was that she was clutching her chest and throwing up by the alley a couple of blocks down.

Then she remembered sitting on a bench in an empty churchyard just staring into the void. Her eyes were wide and dry from lack of tears. She was numb from the cold as she forgot her coat on her way out. But the physical numbness couldn't match her frozen heart. Her mind couldn't think of excuses or explanations why Laura would do this to her. It should be easier to feel; but she couldn't, wouldn't.

* * *

The next month of Emily's life sped by. She had packed a bag the very next day and stayed in a hotel. She took no calls, submerged herself in work, ate little and barely slept. She cut herself off, stopped travelling and dwelled in the world in her head. Time flew forward quickly just because there was no way of returning to the past.

Then she decided and called her lawyer, signed the papers and never looked back.

She felt like an empty shell of her self. She hadn't cried, couldn't cry.

She bought another apartment and officially moved out; she hadn't gone back to her old apartment since that day.

She spent the next two months getting used to a new life – returning to a new place, using a new route to work, cooking for one, being completely alone.

As she thought back about her decision, she realised it didn't come as a surprise to Laura. In fact, it was almost as though Laura wanted it. There was no appeal or private mitigation: the accused accepted the guilt and paid the price. Years of history together were erased as though the past had never happened. Emily knew she ought to feel grief or loss, or some form of sadness that one should experience when one erases someone from their life but she couldn't emote. Her life was in stasis.

On an impulse, she packed a bag, called up work and took a week of leave, and booked the next available bus out of London. She was going to find Naomi. Naomi was the only person that wasn't part of her world in London that she could find solace. Emily knew that Naomi could provide a solid comfortable company that she could really do right now; she needed a friend.

.

.

Emily arrived at six-thirty in the evening in Edinburgh. She followed a familiar route and arrived at Snax Café. The shop was blanketed in darkness; a sign read that it closes at five.

She couldn't fathom where Naomi would be. She thought Snax would be the best bet where she could probably meet Effy who would know where Naomi lived.

_Effy._

She rummaged through her bag, almost frantically slipping her hand into side pockets and unearthed a stiff cardboard coaster with a neat scrawl of numbers. It was the very same coaster Naomi wrote Effy's number on which she had left it in the bag and completely forgotten about.

With a sigh of relief, she entered the numbers into her phone.

The line connected after a good five rings.

"_Who is this?"_ A pointed, dry voice laced with a faint surprise answered. Emily hadn't actually heard Effy's voice.

"Effy?" Emily checked.

She was met with a blank silence, but it seemed to be an affirmation; the line did not hang up.

Emily continued hesitantly, "This is Emily. Naomi gave me your number in case I needed to find her. Do you know where she is? I need her now." She felt her voice suddenly break a little, inappropriately, at the admission of those last few words.

There was another deep silence. Then Emily heard an imperceptible intake of breath.

"_Meet me at Sixty-three Dean Path."_

"Why? Is Naomi there?" Emily didn't recognise the address.

"_Sixty-three Dean Path."_ Effy repeated, almost a silent command. _"See you in half and hour."_ The line went dead.

Emily was flummoxed. It was a cold winter February and the sky was already dark, yet she couldn't disobey Effy's strange request; she needed to find Naomi even though she knew it was an ungodly hour.

She hailed a cab and gave the address, feeling more perplexed by the minute. She hardly knew Effy, never spoke to her till today, yet she completely trusted Effy's words. Somehow she felt uneasy and unsettled about Effy's tone.

"Here we are," the cab driver announced, breaking Emily out of her reverie.

She squinted out of the window into the mournful dark night, perplexed but she paid the driver all the same.

A couple of street lamps lit the road; there wasn't a soul in sight. She stared up at the building in front of her with a frown. The sign by the gate read _'Dean Cemetery'_.

Her eyes did a double take.

She swung her head around to the houses behind her. _Must be one of these houses, _she assured herself. She realised she never knew where Naomi lived. There were so many things that she, as a friend, should have asked. She wrapped her coat tightly around her wishing Effy would arrive soon. The cold wind was chilling to the bone and she didn't exactly feel comfortable waiting beside a cemetery either.

"Emily."

A voice materialised out of the inky dark surroundings, genuinely startling her. Effy was in a large grey hoodie with the hood over her head. Emily could barely make out the features on Effy's face but she knew it was her.

"Come with me." Effy said softly.

With that, she walked noiselessly a few steps ahead of Emily. And to Emily's greatest surprise, Effy pushed open the gate of the cemetery and slipped in.

_What?_ Emily's brain questioned. She hurried after Effy, utterly confused.

"Effy, where's Naomi?" Emily called out shakily to the skinny girl walking quickly in front of her; she didn't exactly like to be in cemeteries at night.

But Effy help walking, her pace seemed to increase or was it that Emily's pace seemed to unintentionally hold her back. She looked around her, eyes meeting a few elaborate and magnificent tombstones to simple ones. A chill crawled through her like an ice-cold hand and she shivered, either in anxiety, confusion, or from the cold. The hairs behind her neck were prickling; her heart was already thudding loudly in her ears.

Effy stopped walking and stood strategically at a spot. Emily slowly approached her. Time seem to stand frightfully still. Effy's eyes were trained on a small rectangular tombstone that paled in size compared to the large ones she saw. _It can't be._

Emily's heart shuddered as her eyes took in the words that were carved in a light slate-grey coloured font.

Naomi Campbell  
1983-2012  
When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced.  
Live your life in such a way that when you die the world cries and you rejoice.

Emily dropped her bag she was carrying.

"No no no no no, it can't be." She repeated, shock rattling every fibre in her body. A heavy boulder seemed to have dropped straight into her heart and was straining and sinking in her chest. Short, painful gasps were escaping her mouth as she struggled to breathe the cold air in with difficulty. She felt the blood drain from her face. Her knees hit the damp grass as she sank as the sudden weight of grief crushed down unbearably. "Why? How?" She asked, her voice feeble and wavering; her hands started to shake.

"Congenital heart defect. Gina had this too." Effy pointed calmly at another tombstone beside Naomi's.

Emily's eyes picked up the faded words _Gina Campbell_, on the other tombstone.

"She was forty-six. One day she was out buying groceries and the next minute she was gone. Broke Naomi's heart. She moved here with her boyfriend to get away from London but broke up with him because she knew she was a ticking time bomb too. She didn't want to be a burden to him and break his heart should she go one day." Effy recited softly, her voice in a whisper, her eyes still fixated on Naomi's tombstone.

"She never told me about her condition." Emily was struck by how miserably little she knew about Naomi. She realised that their interactions were infrequent and whenever they spoke, Naomi only asked Emily about herself and barely revealed anything personal. "Why didn't she tell me anything?" Emily questioned sadly but it was more of asking herself that question.

How could this girl who had so much going on still had a positive outlook on life? Naomi had made nothing but a positive impact on her from the start she met her.

"She never told anyone, never got too close to anyone, wanting less people to grief over her death if she left the world early. She forgot that she could hurt her friends too." A momentarily sadness grazed over Effy's voice. "She didn't expect to meet you," Effy turned her head and looked at Emily, her blue eyes piercing into hers. "You were special. She gave you my number, something she never does. It's like she gave you a point of contact to get to her, to let you reach out to her when you needed someone. She selfishly wanted to be in your life, even when she knew she could hurt you too."

Thick tears welled up in Emily's eyes. She blinked and two hot tears tumbled down the cold skin on her cheeks. "Too soon… too young." Emily choked out.

"She didn't expect this to be so soon. We never did. Things are always unexpected." Effy said, her voice sounding shaky for the first time tonight.

Emily wanted to ask how Naomi went but she couldn't bring herself to ask the details she knew she couldn't handle right now.

The sudden realisation of overwhelming loss dawned upon her and she completely broke down. She emptied herself completely. The outpouring of tears was a release of everything that she had contained in herself for the past few months – the loss of her marriage, of years of being with someone, losing the life she built and of losing a friend – Naomi.

Losing Naomi was like the trigger. She never expected Naomi to subconsciously mean so much to her. She realised that she had put a tiny piece of hope into Naomi to be the constant in her changing life, to be there for her; there was so much about Naomi she had hoped to know but she would never get the chance anymore. There was just too much regret in her life.

There was a light, comforting pat on her shoulder. "I'll leave you alone for a while," Effy said.

Everything was so fragile. Life was so fragile. Loss was real. It's always too late when we realise we can never get back something or someone that meant much more than we thought. We could meet someone, and before we know it, they could be gone without a word, taken so brutally and abruptly away, or leaving so silently or cruelly. Life was that unexpected, whimsical and contained so much devastating heartbreak.

As for Naomi and herself, they never had much time together to foster a stronger friendship. But Naomi was a blessing, an angel, and a miracle that made an impact on her and taught her to look at life positively even if the odds are against you. Although she had "selfishly" roped Emily into her life, Emily would rather have met Naomi than never having met her at all. She will have to cope with loss.

Emily took one last look at the words on Naomi's tombstone. "I will always remember you, Naomi," she said.

And she brushed her tears away.


End file.
